Two things: The first was the image above. The second is the article here Stop Policing My Daughter’s Appetite.
Our culture allows us to “compliment” each other as females on how we LOOK and what we EAT or DON’T EAT. Is that okay? How does it make us feel?
Yes, for sure, I like to be complimented on how I look…particularly if I put a lot of work into it! On normal day, I spend as little time as I can doing my hair and what little bit of makeup that I wear. I avoid blow drying my hair because I do not have the patience for it. I like the way I look and feel on those normal days. I do like to be complimented, especially by my husband because he is important to me and I care what he thinks. I am not sure that I care significantly what the random person on the street or even an acquaintance thinks about my looks. But is this how we should assess each other? When we see a little girl, should we discuss how she cute she looks first? Should this be the first discussion point with our friends? Is it what you and your friends discuss?
I especially noticed the tendency to be negative about ourselves and how we look this week when I had to hand out school pictures to students. Almost every female student, and many male students, took their school picture and immediately said how horrible they looked in it and hid it. I wonder how much of this is the dramatics and how much is legitimately feeling they don’t look good in the picture? After a few more minutes of looking at their own pictures and their friends pictures, the students tended to get more critical of themselves talking more specifically about what was terrible in their pictures. They would also tend to be more forgiving of their friends pictures, saying how much better it was then their own. The discussion would then turn into a competition about whose picture was worse. How hard are we on ourselves? Why? Why has that become so acceptable?
What about our diet or eating habits? Not the kind of diet where we restrict our foods but rather the kind of diet that means just what we eat. How often do we discuss our eating habits? How critical are we of ourselves?